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Tag Archives: Film

Advertising, Attenborough, Ham, and Humility.

11 Monday May 2026

Posted by Thin Air Factory in Uncategorized

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David Attenborough, Film, green-eyed-monster-films, Humility, learning-through-landscapes, nature

In Advertising [or at least the advertising world that was] the gifts were obvious, and all about us. Creativity was ostensibly king and the rewards plentiful: Large [and for some vast] salaries, living like ersatz Lords and Ladies; expensed lunches, production company jollies, and the ‘second office’ [whichever pub was closest to the agency] from which to do business. And then there was the old creative team joke of starting a script with the words ‘Open on a pair of international plane tickets…’ There was so much to be enjoyed that, if you weren’t careful, any real gifts could pass you by, and you’d never ever notice.

Spurred by watching David Attenborough’s 100th Celebration. this post is about one of those gifts; a much rarer one; let’s just call it a revelation.

If it is possible to have a Damascene moment in what had become a quite bloated, self-aggrandising industry, mine happened at the tail of my tenure in old school advertising land.

It came via a call from long-time collaborator, the very fine and brilliant Mark Downes, of Green Eyed Monster Films.

“I’ve a small scripting task, if you’re up for it?”

A beer was had and chats revealed that it was for a trust called Learning through Landscapes, a small and rather amazing bunch focused on helping schools unlock the power of their grounds to enrich education, nurture wellbeing, and deepen connection with nature. The jewel in this crown was that one of their Trustees was the indomitable Sir David, and he was prepared to front the film if his schedule allowed. We just needed to spark his interest and commitment to being involved.

We developed a film idea, called ‘Conserving Wonder,’ focused on how the natural world stimulates children’s sense of wonder in nature, and why that’s worth conserving. The film set out to illustrate in simple terms the pressure on schools’ depleting outside spaces, and how nature could work as an offset strategy to school children’s increasing classroom incarceration. It felt like something only Sir David could land, in his own inimitable way.

Obviously, Sir David is written through every moment of my own sense of natural wonder growing up. His voice was seared into my psyche. He was solely responsible for bringing the natural world into my sitting room. Sunday was the perfect day for his wonder-filled sermons on the natural world: there was a sense of reverence and majesty in every episode. And amongst it all, Sir David seemed blissfully unaware that of all the creatures he filmed, he was one of the rarest. In that way Attenborough is a unicorn: a creature whose very existence within it seems to hold the world in balance. So to say that I was excited to be working with him is an understatement of life-sized proportion.

Prior to the shoot, I had both the honour and the pleasure of sitting in Sir David’s library room in Richmond, surrounded by his books and mementoes of travels to far off places, talking about the best script narrative and arc for the film. It was a golden gift, a once in a lifetime experience. But it was only the beginning. He is indeed the gift that keeps on giving.

As we drove to the school where the filming was to take place, I posed him a question. I used to walk around Regent’s Park every morning. At the northern-most point of my walk I would edge along the path next to the zoo. I would delight in the sounds of the animals in their morning reverie. But one thing fascinated and amused me more than any other. There was a bird who would ‘kick off’ every time it heard a police or ambulance siren [which was often]. I had recorded the bird on my phone, so I played it to him. He listened intently to the bird’s call, chiming with the police sirens passing around it, pondered, then said “I think that may well be an Australian Whipbird” My own private nature lesson.

We arrived at the school, excited and expectant. Before filming was to happen, Sir David was going to address the children. It was a master class in story telling. The particular story he told in their assembly was about Crocodiles in the Everglades at night. They were mesmerised, as were all the adults. He knew his audience.

When filming began, another masterclass. His ability to internalise our narrative and execute it reminded me that he is a storyteller of epic proportion: a master of his art. The children adored him of course, and they had none of the legacy of a life time of his storytelling to ignite them. In person he just is that person.

Which brings us to the ham in our story sandwich.

We broke for lunch, and for Sir David to rest. There was some confusion about where the sandwiches were, but they were eventually located in the headmistress’s office. People milled about chattering and grabbing sandwiches and crisps, then suddenly, the door closed, and there I was with Sir David, perched on smallish chairs, with our sandwiches on small paper plates. It can only have been 20 minutes or so, but we sat, eating sandwiches, speaking of his recent travels. He had just returned from his grand tour of a vast community of global scientists and naturalists. Until this moment he had eschewed wading in on the Climate Crisis conversation. He was a scientist. He needed empirical proof of its truth. He’d been given it; and seemed laid low by it. He was obviously troubled by what he’d been told – and he was aware that suddenly time was against him, and he felt there was much to do.

As we nibbled on our ham sandwiches, the one thing that struck me about him, beyond his passion and professionalism, and the visceral sense of care he felt for the natural world, was his humility. Given all he has achieved, he is a remarkably humble man.

As someone who’d spent decades in an industry riddled with hubris and an often wildly misguided sense of its own greatness and importance [I include myself in this], here was a man who was truly engaged in shaping the culture of our world and changing it for the better. But his demeanour was one of sublime humility in the face of the majesty of the natural world he loved and his commitment to conserving it in whichever way possible.

They say ‘don’t meet your heroes, you may well be disappointed.’ In this instance, this was about as far from being the case as is possible. Being with Sir David, for even the shortest time, was revelatory, and for me at least, life changing. My story is I am sure, one of tens if not hundreds of thousands of similar stories told and retold over the years about how Sir David Attenborough has changed people in some profound way; but it’s mine.

Mark Downes made a remarkable little film; discrete, well balanced and beautifully judged. It tells a simple story: of what nature means to children, their education and their sense of wonder in the world, and what we can do to help conserve that wonder. Sir David ends the film with a typically quiet yet profound question: ‘if children do not understand and experience nature, they will not grow up to protect it. And if they don’t, who will?’ Quite.

Watch it here.

It was an honour to be a part of this project, so I thank Mark and the smart folks at Learning through Landscapes for the gift of that experience – and Sir David for opening my eyes a little more to what is possible with the right passion and perseverance. Steely is the word they use for. him. Thank god for that. We are all the. richer for it.

Perfume, puffery & a Zynga Guide to the future of Fragrance Ads.

07 Monday Dec 2015

Posted by Thin Air Factory in Uncategorized

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Alps, Brenner Pass, Director of Photography, Film, fragrance, Giselle, Jaguar XK 180, Jude Law, Lee Mack, Malibu, Neel Kolhatkar, Peage, PS3, Roma

Screen Shot 2015-12-07 at 17.00.44.png

Where did she come from? where am I going?

Life is a journey

Seize it

Outside is just inside…out

Peace is Love. Love is war. War is Peace. 

Destiny

Tarmac

Sex

Penis

Fire hydrant

Neel Kolhatkar, an Australian comedian, has created a small film called How to make a Fragrance Commercial that celebrates the increasingly ludicrous genre of the Fragrance or Perfume commercial. It is a small pleasure to view.

We have the use of the abstracted journey – infinite; never ending; circular. Run through with a yearning of some sort. Add one very pretty girl with a form of hair Tourrette’s – incapable of resisting running her hand across or through her silken mane for more than a second.

And the insanity of gibberish of course: crack induced riddles tripping the enigmatic light fantastic. Or bollocks if you will.

Lee Mack has also celebrated the bollocks of the language and accent of fragrance commercials, much to our amusement.

And the joke is not lost on us – as hundreds of thousands of us it would seem enjoy looking at and agreeing with their world view.

BUT. Someone has to be taking this seriously. Someone has to be buying this pap. Why would someone otherwise invest that much time energy money and hand picked, studio preened talent to make them, again and again.

I hold my hands up – I did go Ooohh! when I saw the one with Marilyn et al morphed in to the ad via super whizz bang SFX computer imaging. But only once. Not that anyone cares. If anyone gets into trouble they can always point to the Chanel No5 piece having 12M+ views. I thank you.

There is also an element of infantilisation going on here to a certain degree. These commercials are used on us like shiny jewels slung from a music mobile hung above our ‘cot’ – the plinky-plinky music, like a child’s music box confection played out to the mesmeric movement of shiny things that we can reach for. Ooosshhy boooshy boooshy booo. Who’s a beautiful boy then. It’s Christmas. Ohhhh. Shiny.

Shiny is beautiful. Shiny is reassuring. While Jude Law drives through stunning landscapes in a stunning car everything is alright. Terrorist threats and world hunger simply disappear as if by magic. Community fracture, eating disorders and fear of unemployment dissipate in a diffusion of citrus, rose otto and bergamot mist.

Happy day.

But, just to be a grinch for a moment longer, in a time of austerity, collapsing brand budgets, and fashion houses and brands going bankrupt all over the place, all of the time, how do they get away with it?

How does the Brand creative director get away with it? And the Director for that matter? In budgetary heist terms it is, let it be said, a stroke of genius: an Oceans Eleven of Marketing. At no point is the endeavour ever really intended to get beyond a luvy fest, extended camping holiday with 3 weeks of post production catering attached. That a commercial comes out at the end is frankly a miracle.

Everything is in the script:

Open on a set of Long Haul aeroplane tickets.

Cue music track rerecord by someone the writer slept with at Burning Man 

Light refracts through sun flare. We sense someone: famous: really really famous.

We see grade Hollywood A Lister in frame come into close up and focus – in a state of distress, the Malibu surf framing their pained expression.

Camera pans out across their shoulder and the bonnet of a classic XK 180, parked at the coast roadside behind them.

On its polished bench seat we see a hand crafted hold-all in exquisitely turned leather and open white stitching with polished lalique clasps.

We see the bag is stuffed with the film production budget blocked and bound in various denominations.

We see the long shadow of the Director’s new art department ‘squeeze’ fall across the driver’s seat. The keys in the ignition scream TURN ME ON.

We cut to cool city or landscape at dusk/night. A car – our car – is stationary outside a plain ‘edgy’ doorway: a man in a long coat grey hat smoking a cigarette stands beside it half in shadow.

We blink; eyelids close – to black – and open. More flared light.

We are inside a bar. It is buzzing: with the Art Director’s boyfriend and their close NYC facebook friends.

Cut to enigmatic pack shot.

Music Ends 

Shazzam.

You have yourself a Fragrace Advert.

And talk me through the obtuse re-recording of karaoke-famous musical tracks? One of these recordings is of such high camp, I would strongly recommend having an oxygen tank and some DVT socks to hand.

I’m thinking of course of the music in the Chanel No5 piece with Giselle: a tangential narrative punctuated by cards with lyrics written with epigrammatic aplomb and enigmatically distributed.

In this film there is of course a random child (who surely should be put into care given the elegant speed with which her parents seem to nip off to far flung places in pursuit of something different at the drop of a hat. Thankfully, in the full length version there is a Grannie/Nanny left to fend for the child – the least we’d expect from a family with such an expansive beach house: staff.)

Now that track: The One That I Want. Lo Fang. Breathy. Sparse. Jazz. Art.

Yes: it’s a re-record. And re-records have been very recherché for a few years now. Since 2008, everyone and their transgender partner is doing it, inspired by re-records of famous tracks by highly individual, mainly female singers for John Lewis et al. (They couldn’t resist going Half The World Away with Aurora this Christmas.)

But the Lo Fang track is knowing in a very different way. It adds a level of high camp that more mortal creative directors and producers could only dream of. Taking a track that would happily grace a Will & Grace house party and then raise the camp bar further by art jazzing it is audacious indeed.

I am not sure how anyone could better this on the camp-o-meter.

So I wonder what next? Perhaps they will have to go the other way. Perhaps we will get really, really high camp songs re-recorded with brutal street grit.

Rocky Horror’s Sweet Transvestite could be covered by The Streets.  And come to think of it, D12 could do a storming version of Let It Go from Frozen. So, there is definitely some more room for manoeuvre in there – a few more rungs of insanity to climb before we run out of puff in the music department.

Now what of the journey? Part of me desperately wants the exquisite wide shot of the beautiful car crossing the bridge to the city in the Chanel No 5 ad to be interrupted by the highly irritating Sat. Nav. saying “At the next junction, turn left, then turn right, and follow the ring road back to your child as they are currently playing with an electric iron in the infinity pool.”

With all this enigmatic driving around to no real end (even Jonny Depp’s at it) there must be a probability calculation on the back of a napkin somewhere that tells us when and where they might all collide?

Given that driving is so central to many of these commercials, perhaps there is a Peage in Fragrance Film Land somewhere where it all comes together – a place where, if you parked up with a sandwich and a thermos for long enough, you’d have the pleasure of watching a caravanserai of some of the most beautiful cars in the world driven by some of the most highly paid actors stream past. (Who needs the Mille Miglia.)

I can just see them arriving at the Peage gate and, on realizing they do not have Telepeage, rooting in their oh-so-gorgeous bag for a handful of ‘change’ (it would have to be a fist of exotic coins; cast with distracted elegance – there’s no cool Slo Mo moment to be had in popping your carte VISA in a gnarled plastic slot – a sexual metaphor perhaps but no filmic opportunity).

And then, as quickly as they arrive, they are through the Peage, all driving off in different directions to continue the eternal journey.

Maybe this meeting point might create a whole new dimension of Fragrance Ad.

Perhaps if we laddered back, one of those breath taking crash reverses up into the heavens; into the atmosphere above (and god knows theres an industrial quantity of very expensive atmosphere to ladder through), we would reveal that Fragrance Film Land is in fact a sort of board game of life – a Snakes and Ladders meets Monopoly of circular and inter-related narratives criss-crossing at various points across multiple terrains and contexts – by/in/on/above/beneath an Alpine tunnel, Malibu beach house, NYC studio, Parisian rooftop, Roman side street or Utah dirt road, at sunset/sunrise/Spring/Fall/Christmas/Lunar Eclipse.

Maybe we could gamify Fragrance Film Land? A sort of Farmville meets Mario Kart for perfume. Choose your character and vehicle. Choose your eternal circular yearning journey. Choose your mood/season/context. Choose your re-record soundtrack. Bingo. We’re off.

And the pedal hits the metal. Chanel 5. Black Ops. Available for PS3.

Now that would be worth switching on for.

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